An Open Letter to The Girl Who Dates Him Next

Dear ______,

I don’t know whether to say congratulations, you’re so lucky, or to tell you to run away as fast as you can. As Jana Kramer says, I got the boy, but I can’t tell you if you got the man.

I guess I want to tell you a little bit of both.

You are lucky. He’s a great guy. He’ll love you and he’ll show you so much affection it’ll make you sick. But he’ll also probably lie to you about something stupid because he knows what he’s done bothers you. He’ll probably get mad at you because you’re trying to explain something to him but he feels you’re telling him he’s stupid.

You’re lucky because you’ll get someone who tells you he loves you and you make him happy daily, but you also need to run because he just might be lying. He might be telling you that because that’s what he thinks you need to hear right now.

You’re lucky because you have someone who will try really hard to love the things you love and will introduce you to the things he does and you’ll fall in love with those as well, but you should run because sometimes his family makes life too hard. Sometimes his family tries to control every single aspect of your relationship, and while they’re great people, sometimes it becomes too much to handle.

You’re lucky because you got the person I loved so deeply and passionately. You’re lucky because you get to hold what use to be my world in your arms whenever you want to.

But there’s a few things you should know…

He’s indecisive.

He wants you to support him, but don’t ever tell him when he’s wrong.

He pretends you’re important to him, but he’ll probably choose his friends over you.

He won’t stick up for you when it comes to his friends and family because you can “handle yourself.”

He’ll depend on you a little too much where it gets to the point you feel like his mom.

He’s moody.

He’s very emotional.

He’ll lie.

And then act like “sorry” is the answer to any problem.

He’ll ignore any problems that arise.

He’ll tell you things you want to hear…

And make you feel on top of the world.

He’ll stop caring.

He’ll tell you he feels nothing for you.

He’ll tell you he’s done for good…his feelings are never coming back.

And then he’ll leave you.

So right now you are lucky, but a few months from now, maybe even a year or two, you might be the one telling another girl to run as fast as she can.

Advertisements

The Final Goodbye of 2016

Falling in love with you was the worst decision I’ve ever made. 

Three years ago, I made that decision to love you. To love you with every part of me, fully and fearlessly. Through the bad and through the good. The hard and the easy. The boring and the exciting. 

And boy, did I have to put up with some crap that I shouldn’t have had to, but I did and I stayed and I stuck by your side. And loved you more than anything. 

I planned my entire future around you. I planned it to be with you. And you did, too. 

Until one day you decided I was no longer apart of your future or your present. 

You decided there was no place left for me in your life. There was no more happiness, there was no more laughs, there was no more adventure. 

When you left, it broke me. You took my heart with you. I lost apart of me–if not most of me.

It’s funny, isn’t it? You spend so much time with someone, and for some reason you become their everything, their entire world. And then one day, you decide to leave and then they’re left with nothing. 

It’s so funny to me because I did make you my world and that was my biggest mistake. It’s hard to go places because every one of my favorite places, I took you to. All the songs I once loved are so hard to listen to because you started loving them as well. So many memories were made with you that I want to so badly forget about. 

When we first broke up, all I wanted was for you to come back to me. All I wanted was to wake up to a text, or see you at my door, but it never happened. Every day I wanted you back, you were busy moving on with your life. 

It’s only been about three weeks, and it’s still hard, but it’s getting easier every day. I miss you less and less, I wonder what you’re doing less and less, but there is still a part of me that wishes you’d change your mind.

I do wish you nothing but the best. I have nothing bad to say about you because you are amazing. You’ve always been amazing. You’re so caring, and loving, and you’re so sweet. You’re supportive and you’re trustworthy. 

Once you do a little growing up, someone is going to be so lucky to have you. They’ll get to see what I’ve seen in your from the beginning. 

As I say goodbye to 2016, I also say goodbye to you. The piece of my heart that I lost. 

When You Just Can’t Seem To Win

Have you ever tried so hard to be the perfect someone? Whether it be for your parents, a significant other, or just someone you want to look perfect for…

Have you ever tried so hard to be the perfect someone, but you never ever seem to be able to do it? No matter what you do they always find fault in it, you’re never good enough.

For the last two years or so, I’ve been trying to live up to these unreachable standards that have been set by someone that shouldn’t even mean that much to me. I’ve wanted to be the perfect, model citizen. The person who doesn’t do any wrong, never says a bad word, doesn’t touch alcohol…the list is endless.

But recently I’ve realized, those thing I’ve been trying not to do are already part of who I am. I don’t cuss, I don’t drink, I don’t sleep around…I’m always comparing myself to the people that this person finds to be perfect, and I can’t see any way I’m not just as good as them.

I’m trying to be something that I already am and something that I’ll never be so for the people trying to live up to these realistic expectations, STOP. Stop trying to be something you’re not. Stop trying to be everything this person wants you to be. You are perfect the way you are and nothing will ever change that.

If someone can’t accept you for who you are, they aren’t worth being in your life. While you may miss out on a couple things in life by not living up to whatever they want, they’re missing out on so much more than they could ever imagine. You should feel bad for them. Don’t ever feel bad about not being “good enough” for them.

You’re good enough in someone’s eyes. You’re good enough in your mom and dad’s eyes. They’re just biggest critics. They love you.You’re good enough for your boyfriend or girlfriend. You’re just looking for reasons not to be. And you’re good enough for anyone else and if you’re not, forget them. They don’t matter.

You’re good enough.

An Open Letter to The Boy Who Broke My Heart

Dear ______, 

I gave you two years of my life. You promised me forever. We planned our future together. You had me tricked that you were my Once Upon a Time, but oh, that just wasn’t true. 

I don’t hate you though. Not at all. At first, I did. I felt so strongly about how much pain you put me through, that I honestly thought I hated you, but I can’t hate you for deciding you didn’t actually love me. It would’ve been selfish to force you to pretend.

I don’t regret the memories made, the laughs shared, the smiles captured, but I do regret the tears cried, the lies built, and the pretending we were happy. 

You broke my heart. I cried for a long time after we finally ended things. Even weeks after we called it quits, I thought I owed it to you if I talked to some guy or went on a daye. I thought I needed to call and tell you and apologize. It took me forever to realize you didn’t care. You didn’t answer my phone calls or reply to my texts. The only thing I ever got from you was a message saying that you were disappointed in me for hanging out with other guys. 

You ruined a lot for me. I’d go somewhere and have to leave because it reminded me of you. I would hear a song and I’d have to change it because it brought back memories of you.  From the first lie, the first time you said you needed time, I should’ve ran, but I didn’t. I tricked myself into believing you were different, that you didn’t really mean any of the mean things you did or said to me. I should’ve listened to my head and I should’ve  ran far, far away. 

It didn’t take long for you to move on and find a new girlfriend. It hurt. I was extremely jealous. And I spent hours endlessly creeping on the two of you. Eventually, I found out you treated that girl the same way. 

Not everything was negative about our relationship. You taught me not to give my all to someone who didn’t put the same effort in. You taught me not to give something up just to make someone stay. You taught me how to love someone truly and with my whole heart. You taught me not to give people chances who did not deserve my trust. But most importantly, you taught me how to forgive. 

I hope life is treating you well and you treat your next girl better than you treated me. 

Sincerely, 

Brittni. 

An Open Letter To His Family

This is an open letter to the family of the boy I fell in love with: 

I’m going to start this off by saying I don’t hate any of you. I could never hate y’all. I’ve known all of you for so many years and have come to love each and every one of you, that no matter what y’all did, I could never hate you, but that doesn’t mean I’m not hurt by the things you have done.

A part of me hopes that one of you see this, and a part of me hopes you never do. It has been sitting on my heart long enough that I knew I needed to get it out in the open, even if none of you ever see it.

I’ll never understand why each of you have made the decisions you have about me, but I respect them. No matter how long I have to go through this or what I actually have to go through, I’ll always respect each of you and the decisions you make. I may not ever understand or agree with them, but you’re all adults I grew to respect and love over the years.

Over the last 365 days, all of you have hurt me, in more than one way, but I don’t hate any of you. What I feel is hurt, and sadness. I feel betrayed, in a way. I feel as though I’m not good enough for not only him, but for any of you either.

Over the last 365 days, I’ve gone through the days being as happy as I could be because I’ve gotten the chance to get to know your son and grandson on a more personal level than ‚ÄčI have over the years I’ve known him. I’ve gotten the chance to know the amazing man you have grown as parents, and helped raised as grandparents. I’ve gotten the chance to be treated the way every girl should be treated by a man.

For all the reasons I have listed above, I want to thank you. Parts of me feel like if you didn’t make the decisions you did, I wouldn’t have been able to love a person the way I love your son, the relationship that the two of us share wouldn’t have had the chance to grow as strong as it is today.

There are days where I’m sad. So so sad. I see other couples out in public being all happy and couply and even with their families and it hits me hard that I can’t have that. Why? Because of age? No. That may be one reason, but there’s more to it, but I wish you all would look past your fears. I wish you would have at least given me a chance. I wish I would have been given the chance to sit down with you and talk about where I see your son/grandson and I going. I wish I wasn’t turned away the second things changed between he and I.

The two of us have already been through so much in just the short amount of time we have confessed our feelings for each other, but all it has done is made us stronger and shown us that no matter what is thrown at us, we can make it through it. No matter what pitch life throws at us, we can hit homeruns all day.

I’ll never understand what I did to make you guys not like me. Is it because I developed feelings for your son/grandson? Because I’m “too old”? Because you’re afraid? 

Whatever the reason–one I’ll probably never know– I’ll respect. I won’t agree, but I will respect. I just ask you never be fake to me, even if you’re trying to make him happy. 

I’ve come to the conclusion that I can take what you all feel or think, or I can take how me and him feel and run with it. And I don’t mean any disrespect by this, but I’m taking how the two of us feel and running with it because in the end, it’s what matters the most to him and me, not you guys. I’m sorry.

Although I feel sad daily because of your decisions, I can’t help but silently thank you for raising an amazing man, allowing me to experience true love, and for putting me to a very hard test. I thank you for allowing my relationship to grow and blossom into something beautiful, and at the end of the day, I leave it in God’s hands.

And when the day comes we are finally allowed to be together, I still won’t hate any of you. I will love you just as I have over the years I’ve known you. I can’t promise I won’t hold a grudge for a little while, but maybe one day, we will all be able to come together and be friends again. Maybe I will never really be accepted. but I still won’t hate you.

All the love.

xo, B.